1 00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:15,557 [Larry] Is anybody worried about dirt on their food here? 2 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:16,975 You know, these buses come by. 3 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,143 Everybody makes such a big deal about eating outside. 4 00:00:19,268 --> 00:00:21,605 - I find it disgusting. - It's Al Fresco. 5 00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,273 Hey, do me a favor and remind me to pick up my glove later. 6 00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:24,816 - I'm getting it restitched. - Okay. 7 00:00:24,942 --> 00:00:26,193 You're wearing gloves? It's the middle of summer. 8 00:00:26,318 --> 00:00:27,694 - No, my baseball glove. - Oh, baseball. 9 00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:29,112 They're in a league. Is that what you call it? 10 00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:30,697 We're playing for the championship. 11 00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:32,866 Are you not listening to anything I've ever told you? 12 00:00:32,991 --> 00:00:34,743 [Larry] I hope it turns out better than the golf championship. 13 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:36,995 - That's true. - Hey, do you want to come? 14 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:38,080 No, I don't like baseball. 15 00:00:38,205 --> 00:00:39,665 - I'm a little surprised. - Why? 16 00:00:39,790 --> 00:00:41,959 Well, you I can understand. You've been married a long time. 17 00:00:42,084 --> 00:00:43,335 You could care less about what he does. 18 00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:46,046 - You're absolutely correct. - But we've just started dating. 19 00:00:46,171 --> 00:00:47,422 And when you first start dating 20 00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:49,049 you always do things that are distasteful. 21 00:00:49,174 --> 00:00:51,885 - That's part of the process. - Fish and chicken. 22 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:54,429 We're splitting that so it really doesn't matter. 23 00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:56,932 Okay, how about I give that to you? 24 00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,726 And chicken. Enjoy. 25 00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:01,937 - That looks good, Jeff. - How do you want to work this? 26 00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:04,231 - I'm gonna keep the chicken. - You can't keep the chicken. 27 00:01:04,356 --> 00:01:05,566 We said we're gonna split it. 28 00:01:05,691 --> 00:01:06,566 That fish, to be honest, 29 00:01:06,691 --> 00:01:07,776 don't look so good. 30 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:08,735 I only chose it because I knew 31 00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:10,112 we were gonna split it. 32 00:01:10,237 --> 00:01:11,989 Look, you brought the fish into it. 33 00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:13,240 I'm saying no. 34 00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:14,283 That's completely unethical. 35 00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:15,784 Honestly, Larry, this is why 36 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:18,161 he's a good manager. You should be thankful he's unethical. 37 00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:20,956 - He's unscrupulous. - You want some of my salad? 38 00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,749 Oh my God. This is amazing. 39 00:01:22,874 --> 00:01:24,084 It looks really really good. 40 00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:26,336 I-I'm not even joking. It's fantastic. 41 00:01:26,461 --> 00:01:27,462 - Really? - The food here is great. 42 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:28,964 - Can I try it? - Nope. 43 00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:31,800 - Just a little taste? - Nope, you made a mistake. 44 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,094 - You're so lying. - No, I swear to God. 45 00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:36,513 [Larry] Well, I learned a very valuable lesson today. 46 00:01:36,638 --> 00:01:38,265 - What did you learn? - I'd rather keep it to myself. 47 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,976 Know something? I've learned a valuable lesson today too. 48 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,478 No, you're only saying you learned a lesson because-- 49 00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:44,980 That's where you're wrong. I'm just sharing. 50 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,857 I know for a fact you did not learn a lesson. 51 00:01:46,982 --> 00:01:48,150 - It's a coincidence. - Yeah. 52 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:49,610 Speaking of lessons, I'm so sorry-- 53 00:01:49,735 --> 00:01:52,446 I have to go. I have a piano lesson. 54 00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:56,325 Good luck at your Wiffle ball game or whatever. 55 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,118 - Softball. - Okay, thanks. 56 00:01:58,243 --> 00:01:59,578 - Bye. - See you after the game. 57 00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:01,246 - See you Thursday. - Alright, take a shower. 58 00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:02,372 Call me. 59 00:02:02,497 --> 00:02:03,915 - Is she a great girl? - She's great. 60 00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:06,793 She likes you, which is a shocking thing to me. 61 00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:08,377 No, she's going out with him again. 62 00:02:08,502 --> 00:02:10,005 - Can I say something? - What? 63 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,882 - I've got to pee. - She gets me. 64 00:02:12,007 --> 00:02:14,508 Well, you're lucky somebody does. 65 00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,971 Larry, favor. Jeff's birthday is coming up. 66 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:19,973 There's a signing thing at the regency. 67 00:02:20,098 --> 00:02:21,683 Mookie Wilson is gonna be there. 68 00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:24,144 I need you to get this signed as a gift. 69 00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:26,104 Can you do that for me? 70 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:33,111 Lar! Lar! 71 00:02:33,236 --> 00:02:36,573 Larry! What happened? Where'd you go? 72 00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:38,282 - I-I'm sorry, what? - Mookie Wilson. 73 00:02:38,407 --> 00:02:40,952 Can you get Mookie Wilson to sign this for Jeff's birthday? 74 00:02:41,078 --> 00:02:42,954 - Oh, yeah. Okay. - Alright? 75 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,413 Yeah, Mookie's his favorite player. 76 00:02:44,538 --> 00:02:46,416 Yeah. '86 Mets. 77 00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:52,631 [Larry] I like her, but she's got a kid so what's gonna come of it? 78 00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:54,174 What's the point of the whole thing? 79 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:57,552 To tell you the truth, whenever I see a woman who's happy, 80 00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:58,970 she's married. 81 00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:02,056 And whenever I see a man who's happy, he's single. 82 00:03:02,181 --> 00:03:04,059 Mathematics of that is confusing, isn't it? 83 00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,644 Yeah. 84 00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:08,438 Anyway, so we were at this restaurant 85 00:03:08,563 --> 00:03:11,024 all of a sudden I heard this Softee music. 86 00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:12,275 The Mr. Softee truck. 87 00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:14,194 The music from the Mr. Softee truck? 88 00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:15,237 Yes. 89 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:16,446 When I was a kid 90 00:03:16,571 --> 00:03:19,157 I had a traumatic incident 91 00:03:19,282 --> 00:03:22,661 involving Mr. Softee. 92 00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:24,705 - Let's do another hand. - Okay. 93 00:03:24,830 --> 00:03:28,333 Two, three, four, five. 94 00:03:28,458 --> 00:03:29,835 - Here we go. - You know what? 95 00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,169 I'm gonna take two. 96 00:03:34,506 --> 00:03:36,258 Alright, Larry, what do you got? 97 00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:38,051 I've got two pair. 98 00:03:38,176 --> 00:03:41,179 Wow, that's pretty good. But not good enough. 99 00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:43,515 I've got a flush. 100 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:46,893 Yeah, that's right. Alright, come on, take it off. 101 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,270 Come on. 102 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:56,194 That's pretty pretty pretty good. 103 00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:03,577 What the hell are you doing with my daughter? 104 00:04:03,702 --> 00:04:06,121 Come here. Come here. 105 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:09,583 You be quiet and you listen to me. 106 00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:11,793 - What the fuck? - Your vagina is showing. 107 00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:15,839 Oh my God. He's got more pubes on his fucking head. 108 00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,382 You forgot something, kid. 109 00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:20,761 What the fuck are you doing, kid? 110 00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:24,264 Put some clothes on, you four-eyed fuck. 111 00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:25,849 And to this day 112 00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:28,476 whenever I see the Softee truck 113 00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:31,229 or especially hear the music, that music 114 00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:33,064 that goes in a continuous loop... 115 00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:45,076 You know what I'm talking about? 116 00:04:45,202 --> 00:04:47,329 It's deeply disturbing, there's no question about it. 117 00:04:47,454 --> 00:04:49,039 But let me just make sure I understand. 118 00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:51,124 You felt humiliated as a result of the strip poker game? 119 00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:53,126 Yes. Do you mind if I put my feet up here? 120 00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:55,378 - Please. - You sure? 121 00:04:55,504 --> 00:04:56,296 A lot of people don't like it. 122 00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:57,339 I am absolutely okay with it. 123 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,423 Although it's just a sneaker. 124 00:04:58,548 --> 00:04:59,633 Well, I think even if it were 125 00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:01,009 a dress shoe I would be fine. 126 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:02,385 You're not gonna resent me when I leave here 127 00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:03,762 for putting my feet up 128 00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:05,680 and putting you in this compromising position? 129 00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,683 I don't feel funny about it, but if it makes you feel better 130 00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:11,228 I have some Japanese slippers you could change into out there. 131 00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:13,688 Oh, that's kind of you to offer but I'd rather not. 132 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:16,440 So just to make sure that I understand things thoroughly, 133 00:05:16,565 --> 00:05:19,236 - You felt humiliated-- - What the hell then, right? 134 00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,029 - Sure, go ahead. - Okay. 135 00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,823 You felt humiliated as a result of this-- 136 00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:24,032 I'm not comfortable with it. 137 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,701 - I'm sorry. - Alright. 138 00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:27,744 This was a girl that you knew 139 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:30,413 from the neighborhood, I presume. 140 00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:32,290 You were playing strip poker with her. 141 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,668 And of course I lost almost every hand. 142 00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:36,586 She took off her socks and shoes. 143 00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:39,589 I feel like if she had taken the top off 144 00:05:39,714 --> 00:05:41,633 my whole life would have been different. 145 00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:46,555 Keep it going. Keep it going, guys. Come on. 146 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,348 - Hey, Yari. Yari. - Keep it going. 147 00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:50,684 - What what what? - What's happening with my car? 148 00:05:50,809 --> 00:05:53,520 Easy job. Be ready tomorrow like I said, okay? 149 00:05:53,645 --> 00:05:54,896 - Really? - You worry too much. 150 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,439 Worry about the game. 151 00:05:56,565 --> 00:05:58,440 We don't need to worry about this game. 152 00:05:58,567 --> 00:05:59,818 You need to worry about the game. 153 00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:01,820 - We got this game. - Championship game. 154 00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:04,363 Bring it in, everybody. Come on. 155 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:09,160 Okay, we're here. 156 00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:14,082 We made it! We made it to the big game. 157 00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:15,666 Center stage. 158 00:06:15,791 --> 00:06:17,002 Every one of you all 159 00:06:17,127 --> 00:06:20,672 give yourselves a clap on the hand. 160 00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:23,925 I am so proud of every one of you. 161 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,887 You know, before I came out today 162 00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:29,973 I think about I'm like the Steinbrenner. 163 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:34,226 And I think, "What would Steinbrenner say right now?" 164 00:06:34,351 --> 00:06:35,979 He would say 165 00:06:36,104 --> 00:06:39,858 that when you put on this uniform 166 00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:41,776 with my name on it, 167 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:44,321 there is no substitute for winning! 168 00:06:44,446 --> 00:06:46,406 No substitute! 169 00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:48,491 Or you hit the deck. 170 00:06:48,617 --> 00:06:50,577 So we're going to go out there 171 00:06:50,702 --> 00:06:53,204 we're going to play this other team, 172 00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:55,832 quote unquote, Raleigh's clothing 173 00:06:55,957 --> 00:07:00,962 with their pussy mustard-yellow shit uniforms. 174 00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:02,880 We aren't just going to beat them 175 00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:05,717 we will grab them and we will fuck 176 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:09,178 their sisters in the cunt! 177 00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:10,889 Are you listening? 178 00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:13,099 Bring it in. Come on. 179 00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:15,518 - Fuck these people! - Fuck these people! 180 00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:17,354 Yes! 181 00:07:17,479 --> 00:07:21,149 Fuck their sisters in the cunt? Who talks that way? 182 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,526 Okay, here we go. Two outs. 183 00:07:23,652 --> 00:07:26,947 This is it championship. One more out, alright? 184 00:07:27,072 --> 00:07:30,241 Ground ball goes to first, second or third or home. 185 00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:31,576 Alright, come on, Yari. 186 00:07:45,548 --> 00:07:47,133 Yes! You got it, Larry. 187 00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:51,012 - Here it comes. You've got it. - Oh! 188 00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:53,056 What the fuck? What? 189 00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:56,017 And now they're going home. 190 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:58,311 How did this-- what? 191 00:07:58,436 --> 00:08:00,397 Where are you? What happened? 192 00:08:00,522 --> 00:08:01,982 I got distracted by the Softee truck. 193 00:08:02,107 --> 00:08:04,567 - By the what? - What a douche. What a douche. 194 00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:07,320 You suck. How could you do this? 195 00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,572 A baby could have kicked that ball 196 00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:11,700 picked it up, thrown it three place. 197 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,702 - You Bucknered me. - I'm sorry. 198 00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:18,790 You fucking Bucknered it. Why is Buckner on my team? 199 00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:21,751 Sorry. 200 00:08:25,380 --> 00:08:26,506 Hey. 201 00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:28,883 Oh, about time. God damn, Larry. 202 00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:30,176 I had a softball game. 203 00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:31,636 - I told you that. - How was the game? 204 00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,138 I made an error in the last inning 205 00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:35,140 with two outs that cost us the championship. 206 00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:36,725 Meanwhile I'm standing the fuck out here counting 207 00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:38,018 my motherfucking nuts. Know why? 208 00:08:38,143 --> 00:08:40,020 I can't get in the goddamn building. 209 00:08:40,145 --> 00:08:42,397 This motherfucker in the glass tube. This dude right here. 210 00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,315 The gatekeeper won't let me in the goddamn building. 211 00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:46,818 - That's totally unacceptable. - That's unacceptable. 212 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:48,486 Let me just say this, okay? 213 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:50,613 On behalf of all Caucasians 214 00:08:50,739 --> 00:08:54,409 I apologize. I apologize for the Caucasian race. 215 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,619 By the way, I have a very good idea for you. 216 00:08:56,745 --> 00:08:58,872 To avoid situations like this in the future 217 00:08:58,997 --> 00:09:02,751 I think you should consider wearing glasses. 218 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,502 - Fuck out of here. - Swear to God. 219 00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:08,048 I have noticed that white people revere black people in glasses 220 00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:11,259 go out of their way to do stuff for them. 221 00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:14,554 If a black man with glasses goes up for a job against a white man 222 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,140 glasses gets the job. No glasses, no job. 223 00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:18,224 We'll try this shit, Larry. It's a wager. 224 00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:20,226 - You're open to it? - I'm open to this shit. 225 00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:21,770 I'll try this shit and see what the fuck happens. 226 00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:23,021 Alright, let's go. 227 00:09:23,146 --> 00:09:24,439 What's going on with Jennifer, man? 228 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,900 - Oh, I'm seeing her tonight. - Oh, ha ha! 229 00:09:27,025 --> 00:09:28,985 See, I get a fucking tingle in my Johnson 230 00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:31,821 when a motherfucker tells me he's about to get some ass. 231 00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:34,741 - Do your goddamn job. - I'm gonna talk to him. 232 00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:42,332 - Oh. - Oh my God. 233 00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:44,793 [Jenifer] Larry, what's the problem? 234 00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:52,884 Well, come on, Mr. Softee. 235 00:09:57,889 --> 00:09:59,974 - Hey, Yari. - Oh. 236 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,142 - Hey. - Hey. 237 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:04,687 - How's it going? - It's great. 238 00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:08,732 - Good. So is the car ready? - Good. Good. Let me check. 239 00:10:08,857 --> 00:10:10,819 By the way, great game yesterday. 240 00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:13,696 - You pitched really well. - It's not ready. 241 00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:15,657 It's not ready? How come it's not ready? 242 00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:16,950 You said it was gonna be ready. 243 00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:20,160 I said it's not ready. 244 00:10:20,285 --> 00:10:21,578 Is it almost ready? 245 00:10:21,703 --> 00:10:24,874 Um, I think half. Half ready. 246 00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:27,961 - Half ready? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 247 00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:29,295 What happened? 248 00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:33,842 I guess I made an error. 249 00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,094 Yeah. 250 00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:38,388 You know what I did? I dropped the ball. 251 00:10:38,513 --> 00:10:41,599 - No big deal. Made an error. - You didn't fix my car 252 00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:44,644 Because I made an error? What are you,12 years old? 253 00:10:44,769 --> 00:10:46,646 What are you, 90 years old? 254 00:10:46,771 --> 00:10:49,482 You let the ball go through your legs. Too too too tot. 255 00:10:49,607 --> 00:10:52,402 The whole season is a complete waste of time! 256 00:10:52,527 --> 00:10:54,445 - It's a softball game! - "It's a softball game?" 257 00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:57,240 You don't understand because you're not the Steinbrenner. 258 00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:58,992 - I am the Steinbrenner. - You're the Steinbrenner? 259 00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,493 - I am the Steinbrenner! - Really? 260 00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:02,996 Steinbrenner owned a major league baseball team. 261 00:11:03,121 --> 00:11:06,207 - I own this team. - You own 12 t-shirts. 262 00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:08,376 I paid for them. Yari's Autonomics. 263 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:12,005 You disgraced, you disgraced my business. 264 00:11:12,130 --> 00:11:13,339 Steinbrenner always say... 265 00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:16,301 He say winning is the only answer. 266 00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:20,138 He says winning all day, every day or go away. 267 00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:22,223 - I'd like the car. - You'd like the car? 268 00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,559 I'd like my championship back. 269 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:25,768 - Give me the key. - You are fired. 270 00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:28,188 Just like, that's what George would do. Take your car. 271 00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:32,066 - Give it to me. - I fire you. Your car is fired. 272 00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:33,985 Take your fucking car. 273 00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:36,279 Here is your key. Here is your key. 274 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,323 I never want to see you or your key 275 00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:40,617 wearing my name on your shirt again. 276 00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:43,410 I won't wear your name on my shirt again, that's a promise. 277 00:11:43,535 --> 00:11:46,706 Don't disgrace me. Get out of my-- Yari's! Get out! 278 00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:49,458 Buckner, fuck you. Go Buckner yourself. 279 00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,252 Go! Faster! 280 00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:54,714 So I get the car back from Yari 281 00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:57,050 it's worse than it was before. I don't know what he did to it. 282 00:11:57,175 --> 00:11:59,302 The front seat is really rattling. It's terrible. 283 00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:03,014 Hold up, hold up. My shoe is untied. 284 00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:05,600 I'm gonna get the tickets. I'll be right back. 285 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:10,313 Sorry, we're sold out. 286 00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:16,527 - What happened? - They're sold out. 287 00:12:16,653 --> 00:12:18,363 - Sold out? - Yeah. 288 00:12:20,698 --> 00:12:22,909 Let me go down here and give it a shot, man. 289 00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:24,077 Wow. 290 00:12:39,217 --> 00:12:40,969 We're good. 291 00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:45,932 - Huh? Wow. - Can you believe that? 292 00:12:46,057 --> 00:12:47,267 Telling you right now, I'm gonna get me a whole new class 293 00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:48,726 of bitches with these on. 294 00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:51,396 Wow, this is amazing. It worked. 295 00:12:51,521 --> 00:12:52,855 They worked. You see, what did I tell you? 296 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,190 You're fucking right. 297 00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:55,650 You know what, this is better than anything 298 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,277 the civil rights leaders have ever come up with. 299 00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:59,862 You're goddamn right. I have overcome, God damn it. 300 00:12:59,988 --> 00:13:00,947 I got to get Mookie's autograph. 301 00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:04,325 I'm gonna check out Joe Pepitone over here. 302 00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:06,160 What's up, man? 303 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:11,332 Hey, Dr. Thurgood. 304 00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:14,836 - Larry, how are you? - Hey, hi. 305 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:16,379 You're getting Mookie's autograph, huh? 306 00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:17,839 Yeah well, I'm usually a Cubs fan. 307 00:13:17,964 --> 00:13:20,675 I'm kind of attracted to the hopeless cases. 308 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,260 Hey, right? 309 00:13:22,385 --> 00:13:23,886 Well, listen, I hope you'll excuse me. 310 00:13:24,011 --> 00:13:25,554 You know when you were a kid walking with your mother 311 00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:27,223 through Bohack's, you saw your teacher 312 00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:30,643 and you had to realize she didn't live in school? 313 00:13:30,768 --> 00:13:32,895 You understand? Larry, I don't live in school either. 314 00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:35,898 You know what I mean? Nice to see you. 315 00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:37,525 I have no idea what you're talking about. 316 00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:41,195 Hey, listen. So I've got to talk to you about something. 317 00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:44,490 What happened was I was in a softball game 318 00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:46,284 and I heard the Softee theme. 319 00:13:46,409 --> 00:13:47,577 Again with the Softee theme 320 00:13:47,702 --> 00:13:49,162 and a ground ball went through my legs. 321 00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:51,122 That cost us the championship in a softball game. 322 00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:53,916 Are you absolutely sure that you want to deal with this here? 323 00:13:54,042 --> 00:13:55,251 I mean, while we're here? 324 00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:56,961 What's the big deal? We're just on line. 325 00:13:57,086 --> 00:13:59,422 And then that night I was in bed with a woman 326 00:13:59,547 --> 00:14:02,383 and I heard the Softee music again and I couldn't perform. 327 00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:04,427 - Well, it is very troubling. - Yes. 328 00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:06,763 - She called me Mr. Softee. - She did? 329 00:14:06,888 --> 00:14:09,140 My advice is don't try too much at once. 330 00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,768 I had a client once, he was a rock guitarist. 331 00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:14,479 He played for the band, what was the name of it? 332 00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:17,774 Grand Funk Railroad, I don't want to reveal his name because 333 00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:19,400 I already told you he played for Grand Funk Railroad. 334 00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:21,235 You can just look it up. It's Mark Farner. 335 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:23,237 The great thing about Mark Farner was 336 00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:25,406 he didn't mess around with all the extraneous notes. 337 00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:26,699 Do you understand what I'm saying? 338 00:14:26,824 --> 00:14:29,535 He only played the important notes 339 00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:31,120 and that's what I want you to try. 340 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:33,539 I find it a little troubling that you told me his name 341 00:14:33,664 --> 00:14:35,625 because now you could be telling people my name. 342 00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:37,001 It was merely an accident. 343 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:39,921 Well, I don't want this accident to happen with me. 344 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:41,047 I completely understand and I don't think 345 00:14:41,172 --> 00:14:42,340 it will happen with your name. 346 00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:43,716 Have you talked about me to anyone? 347 00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:45,009 Of course, not, I would never do that 348 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,844 to you or any other patient, Larry. 349 00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:49,847 - I just couldn't do it. - Oh my God. 350 00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:54,519 Excuse me one second. I think that's Bill Buckner. 351 00:14:57,939 --> 00:15:00,066 Wow. 352 00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:02,693 - Bill Buckner. Oh my God. - Yeah, how are you doing? 353 00:15:02,819 --> 00:15:03,820 Nice to meet you. 354 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:06,155 This is amazing that you're here. 355 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,491 I can't believe it. I had an incident at a softball game 356 00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:10,034 that was very similar to what you went through. 357 00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:12,412 Of course, yours happened in the World Series 358 00:15:12,537 --> 00:15:14,372 in front of millions of people, but nevertheless 359 00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:16,624 a ball went through my legs and cost us the game. 360 00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:20,002 It was humiliating and people were insulting me. 361 00:15:20,128 --> 00:15:21,671 I can't believe I'm seeing you here. 362 00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:23,381 How did you deal with all that stuff? 363 00:15:23,506 --> 00:15:24,799 You know, when you're giving your best effort, 364 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,467 it's a team game those things happen. 365 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:27,802 You've just got to forget about it. 366 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:29,429 Jeez, you have a really good attitude. 367 00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:32,140 I'd love to talk to you about this. Do you got a minute? 368 00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:34,600 You know, actually I was about ready 369 00:15:34,725 --> 00:15:36,561 to take a break for lunch, yeah. 370 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:39,480 - Can I walk out with you? - Yeah, sure. 371 00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:41,482 Oh, okay, I've just got to get Mookie's autograph. 372 00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:43,109 - I'll get it for you. - Oh great, thanks. 373 00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:45,069 That guy owes me one. 374 00:15:45,194 --> 00:15:47,530 So I saw this commercial last night. 375 00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:49,782 Michael Jordan had a Hitler mustache. 376 00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:51,701 Yeah, I saw that, he's the first one to wear that 377 00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:52,910 since Hitler, isn't he? 378 00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:54,454 You know what? I think that's true. 379 00:15:54,579 --> 00:15:57,874 - Hey, Buckner, you suck. - Hey, have a nice day, fellas. 380 00:15:57,999 --> 00:16:00,835 Nice catch. 381 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:02,503 What jerks, huh? 382 00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:05,756 Oh my God. How do you put up with that? 383 00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:07,550 You just get used to it. 384 00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:09,469 - Fuck you, Buckner! - Hey! 385 00:16:09,594 --> 00:16:11,762 - You stink! - Oh, so do you! 386 00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:13,973 Hey, don't worry about it, Larry. 387 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:15,892 You know, you're gonna drive yourself crazy. 388 00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:17,435 So how long you gonna be around for? 389 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:20,188 You want to go take in a couple of Broadway shows? 390 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:21,689 There's a good one called "Next to Normal" 391 00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:23,483 I hear a lot of good stuff about. 392 00:16:23,608 --> 00:16:24,567 Woman has a bipolar disorder. 393 00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:25,818 Could I interrupt you? 394 00:16:25,943 --> 00:16:27,069 I've got an emergency. 395 00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:29,238 Are either of you gentlemen Jewish? 396 00:16:29,363 --> 00:16:31,365 - Not me. - Uh, yeah, I'm-- 397 00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:32,867 Listen, I have a problem upstairs. 398 00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:35,369 We're doing a Kaddish and we need one more guy 399 00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:36,996 to fill out the minyan. 400 00:16:37,121 --> 00:16:39,165 What's a minyan? 401 00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:40,708 A minyan-- when a Jewish person dies 402 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,502 you need to have 10 men in a room to say a prayer. 403 00:16:42,627 --> 00:16:43,711 It'll take 10 minutes tops. 404 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,087 - I got my friend here. - He could come along. 405 00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:46,214 It's a free lunch. 406 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:47,298 You could have a little entertainment 407 00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,716 while you're watching. 408 00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,927 - It's a free lunch. - Yeah, it's an emergency. 409 00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:52,887 We've got to get to the cemetery. What do you think? 410 00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,014 Have you ever had Jewish food before? 411 00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:58,893 Koufax gave me some kishka one time. 412 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,228 - Okay. - So we can go then? 413 00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:01,979 - Alright, fine. Come on. - Let's go. 414 00:17:02,104 --> 00:17:03,981 Great news. The minyan is complete. 415 00:17:04,106 --> 00:17:05,775 A nice Jewish gentleman has volunteered. 416 00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:07,359 - Thank you very much. - A pleasure. 417 00:17:07,484 --> 00:17:10,029 - I'm gonna give you both-- - Sorry about whatever happened. 418 00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:13,950 I don't really know, but somebody obviously died. 419 00:17:14,075 --> 00:17:16,661 We all have to go at some point. 420 00:17:16,786 --> 00:17:17,787 - Excuse me. - What? 421 00:17:17,912 --> 00:17:19,955 Hopefully there's an afterlife. 422 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,541 I'll keep my fingers crossed. 423 00:17:21,666 --> 00:17:24,042 You never know. Crazier things, right? 424 00:17:24,167 --> 00:17:26,420 Terribly sorry. Are you Bill Buckner? 425 00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:29,298 - Yeah. - Herman here is from Boston. 426 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:30,840 He's a big Red Sox fan and he can't be 427 00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:32,260 in the same room with Bill Buckner. 428 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:33,469 I'll have to ask you to please leave. 429 00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:35,346 - I'm terribly sorry. - Are you serious? 430 00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:39,183 - Are you for real? - October,1986, two outs. 431 00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:41,060 Larry, don't worry about it. Hey. 432 00:17:41,185 --> 00:17:43,563 - They can't help themselves. - You're damn right. 433 00:17:43,688 --> 00:17:44,772 Don't let the door go through your legs 434 00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:46,357 on the way out, Buckner. 435 00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,401 I only regret I can't ruin your life before you leave. 436 00:17:48,526 --> 00:17:50,778 Hey, you won two world championships since then, huh? 437 00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:53,196 That's not enough for you? 438 00:17:53,321 --> 00:17:55,741 It should have been three. 439 00:17:55,866 --> 00:17:57,451 I don't want to be in your stupid minyan anyway. 440 00:17:57,577 --> 00:17:59,287 - Stupid minyan? My uncle died. - How about that? 441 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:00,621 I hope there is no afterlife. 442 00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:02,915 I hope there's no afterlife. 443 00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:03,958 Hey, Larry, what about the kishka? 444 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,127 To hell with the kishka. Come on. 445 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:11,424 - Hey. - Hello. 446 00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:12,842 - Come on in. - Hi, Lar. 447 00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:14,927 Hey. Friend of mine. You might know him. 448 00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:20,433 - Does he look familiar? - Very familiar. Who-- 449 00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:22,268 - Mr. Bill Buckner. - Bill Buckner! 450 00:18:22,393 --> 00:18:24,854 - Hey, how you doing? - How did I not-- oh my God. 451 00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:28,273 - Welcome, Bill Buckner. - Baseball player, right? 452 00:18:28,398 --> 00:18:30,568 - Yeah. This is Susie. - Hi. Come on in. 453 00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:33,529 - Come into our home. - Played for the Dodgers. 454 00:18:33,654 --> 00:18:36,324 The Cubs, the Red Sox. Anybody else? 455 00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:37,825 Yeah, a little bit with the Angels. 456 00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,994 Angels too? How about that? 457 00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,121 This view is awesome. Unbelievable. 458 00:18:42,246 --> 00:18:44,165 We met at a baseball card show. 459 00:18:44,290 --> 00:18:45,708 What were you doing at a baseball card show? 460 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:49,337 What was I doing? 'cause somebody has a loving wife 461 00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:51,047 and I picked up a little something 462 00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:53,299 for somebody's birthday. 463 00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:55,551 - Come on, let me see. - Guess whose name is on there. 464 00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:58,220 - Guess whose name. - Whose name is on there, huh? 465 00:18:58,346 --> 00:18:59,472 - Who's your fav? - Mookie Wilson? 466 00:18:59,597 --> 00:19:01,307 - Yes. - Oh my God. 467 00:19:01,432 --> 00:19:03,517 Do you have the most thoughtful wife in the world? 468 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,228 It wouldn't have happened if I didn't go to the show. 469 00:19:06,354 --> 00:19:08,439 - It was my idea. - Yeah, I did go pick it up. 470 00:19:08,564 --> 00:19:10,066 - But it was my idea. - Let me see. Let me see. 471 00:19:10,191 --> 00:19:11,734 - You want to see it? - Yeah, let me see it. 472 00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:13,653 - Let me see it. - Hey, Buck, catch. 473 00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:14,862 - What! - What are you doing? 474 00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:17,323 - What the fuck? - Hey, I'm sorry. Sorry. 475 00:19:17,448 --> 00:19:19,992 Oh, my God, it's in the middle of the street. 476 00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:21,452 Larry, what the hell were you doing? 477 00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:24,288 - What? No. - Why'd you throw it to him? 478 00:19:24,413 --> 00:19:26,040 I thought you were a professional. 479 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,416 It was a horseshit throw. 480 00:19:27,541 --> 00:19:29,042 No, it was a horseshit catch also. 481 00:19:29,167 --> 00:19:32,588 Hey, Buck, come on. It was a good throw. You bobbled it. 482 00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:35,800 - It was Mookie Wilson, Buckner! - Ooh, Mookie Wilson. 483 00:19:35,925 --> 00:19:37,134 - Yeah. - What'd Mookie do? 484 00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:38,803 All he hit was a shitty ground ball. 485 00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:42,138 Get out, both of you. You ruined the gift. 486 00:19:42,263 --> 00:19:43,557 Larry, that was a horseshit throw. 487 00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:44,600 Come on, it was in your hands. 488 00:19:44,725 --> 00:19:45,935 How could you miss that ball? 489 00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:47,436 - Are you serious? - Shit happens, Larry. 490 00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:48,604 "Shit happens"? 491 00:19:48,729 --> 00:19:50,106 I thought you were a baseball player. 492 00:19:50,231 --> 00:19:52,483 You can't catch a goddamn toss? 493 00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:55,194 Wow, that was great, huh? 494 00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:56,862 That was really good. Thank you. 495 00:19:56,987 --> 00:19:59,448 So did you drink enough to want to come back to my apartment? 496 00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:01,032 - Yes, I think I did. - Really? 497 00:20:01,157 --> 00:20:02,618 Fantastic. Tonight I'm gonna bring it. 498 00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:04,119 - I'm not joking around. - Alright. 499 00:20:04,244 --> 00:20:05,788 The only problem is the car. The seat-- 500 00:20:05,913 --> 00:20:08,874 I just got it out of the shop and it wasn't fixed. 501 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,667 - The seat is still rattling. - Can I sit in it? 502 00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:12,086 - Yeah, you can sit in it. - It's fine. Whatever. 503 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,713 It's just a car. 504 00:20:16,965 --> 00:20:19,635 I actually think I'm going to do very well tonight. 505 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,012 - Oh? - I'm just putting it out there. 506 00:20:22,138 --> 00:20:24,807 I'll put the TV on, we'll start watching TV 507 00:20:24,932 --> 00:20:26,142 as if we're gonna watch TV. 508 00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:30,020 But I'm really gonna try and put moves on you 509 00:20:30,146 --> 00:20:31,313 while we're watching TV. 510 00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:33,357 - That's sort of how I do it. - Uh-huh. 511 00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:35,234 You're not allowed to just say, "Hey let's have sex." 512 00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:36,819 You've got to go around it 513 00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:40,990 like you're doing something else so you fool the woman. 514 00:20:41,115 --> 00:20:43,032 It's like a magic trick. It's sleight of hand. 515 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:45,536 The TV kind of diverts your attention 516 00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:48,164 from what the real agenda is. 517 00:20:48,289 --> 00:20:50,207 Although, does it really? I mean, you know and I know. 518 00:20:50,332 --> 00:20:52,835 I don't know why we have to go through this charade. 519 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:54,128 Anyway, I don't know. 520 00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,088 Do you like I got some mixed nuts. 521 00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:58,090 - Do you like a mixed nut? - Mm-hmm yes. Yeah. 522 00:20:58,215 --> 00:20:59,633 People like a mixed nut. 523 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:01,761 Although when I opened up the mixed nuts 524 00:21:01,886 --> 00:21:04,013 they had put some dried pineapple in there. 525 00:21:04,138 --> 00:21:05,890 Are you kidding me with the pineapple? 526 00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:07,516 It doesn't blend well with the mixed nuts. 527 00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:10,394 The dried pineapple is destroying mixed nuts. 528 00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:13,105 For me, give me a chip any day. 529 00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:14,273 - Do you like chips? - Yeah, yeah. 530 00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:16,776 - You like a good chip? - Yes. Yes. 531 00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:18,234 What about a dip? Do you like a dip as well as a chip? 532 00:21:18,359 --> 00:21:21,280 - Yes! Yes! - You like a chip and a dip? 533 00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:22,406 - Yes! - Right? 534 00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:24,867 Yes! Ooh! 535 00:21:24,992 --> 00:21:27,286 Bad news, I have no dip. 536 00:21:27,411 --> 00:21:28,996 I am so sorry. 537 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:32,416 I am completely dip less. 538 00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:34,417 Oh my God, is this a parking space? 539 00:21:34,542 --> 00:21:36,128 Ho ho ho! 540 00:21:36,253 --> 00:21:39,840 This is my lucky day. 541 00:21:39,965 --> 00:21:41,801 Unbelievable. 542 00:21:43,677 --> 00:21:46,513 Would you mind driving me home? 543 00:21:46,638 --> 00:21:48,265 - What? - I'm kind of done. 544 00:21:48,390 --> 00:21:50,601 I think I need to call it a night. 545 00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:53,479 - Drive you home? - I mean if it's okay. 546 00:21:53,604 --> 00:21:57,023 Why? I thought you were gonna come upstairs. 547 00:21:57,148 --> 00:21:58,692 I'm just kind of ready for bed, you know? 548 00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:01,237 - I'm ready to do the job. - I'm sure you are. 549 00:22:01,362 --> 00:22:03,446 - I'm sure you are. - And I have this theory. 550 00:22:03,571 --> 00:22:05,157 Like for golf, when I have a bad round 551 00:22:05,282 --> 00:22:08,661 my next round is fantastic because I don't care anymore. 552 00:22:08,786 --> 00:22:11,413 I hit the low point. Like, I hit the low point the last time. 553 00:22:11,539 --> 00:22:13,499 And now I know that I stink. 554 00:22:13,624 --> 00:22:15,251 And when I feel I stink I'm good. 555 00:22:15,376 --> 00:22:16,502 Well, let's go for it another night. 556 00:22:16,627 --> 00:22:20,256 I am done. 557 00:22:20,381 --> 00:22:22,383 Alright. I'll take you home. 558 00:22:26,387 --> 00:22:28,138 [Larry] So she said she changed her mind. 559 00:22:28,263 --> 00:22:30,349 No man would ever change his mind, I'll tell you that. 560 00:22:30,474 --> 00:22:32,393 I'm very curious to know why she would do that. 561 00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:33,102 Why? I'll tell you why. 562 00:22:33,227 --> 00:22:35,061 Because when you're impotent, 563 00:22:35,186 --> 00:22:36,355 women treat you like a leper. 564 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,732 You tried to put a noodle in a woman? 565 00:22:38,858 --> 00:22:40,192 Women hate that, man. 566 00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:42,152 That's a remarkably idiotic thing 567 00:22:42,278 --> 00:22:43,779 that you just said, but, you know 568 00:22:43,904 --> 00:22:47,116 the fact that you're wearing glasses, 569 00:22:47,241 --> 00:22:49,743 I perceive it as a little less idiotic than I normally would. 570 00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:51,119 - It's interesting. - You're damn right. 571 00:22:51,244 --> 00:22:52,663 - I'm making sense. - Slightly less stupid. 572 00:22:52,788 --> 00:22:55,082 - You're making a little sense. - I'm making stupid sense. 573 00:22:55,207 --> 00:22:56,834 - You know what I'm saying? - Huh? 574 00:23:00,045 --> 00:23:01,422 What the hell is this? 575 00:23:02,882 --> 00:23:04,925 A bill from the therapist? 576 00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:08,262 I think he charged me for talking to him at the card show. 577 00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:10,848 That's something you got to handle, man. You know? 578 00:23:10,973 --> 00:23:12,766 - You want to take a ride? - Where we going at? 579 00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:14,977 I want to talk to this therapist. 580 00:23:15,102 --> 00:23:16,353 Let's do it. 581 00:23:23,903 --> 00:23:26,446 Mmm. Mmm. 582 00:23:29,325 --> 00:23:31,035 What's with you? 583 00:23:33,829 --> 00:23:36,999 You know what? I think I figured this shit out. 584 00:23:37,124 --> 00:23:39,627 She was getting her rocks off in this damn chair. 585 00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:42,963 Look at me. This shit is a moving dildo. 586 00:23:43,088 --> 00:23:45,925 - You mean like a horse? - This chair is a fuck machine. 587 00:23:46,050 --> 00:23:48,302 Man cannot compete with machinery. 588 00:23:48,427 --> 00:23:50,304 No wonder why she didn't come upstairs. 589 00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:52,973 You're damn right. She was coming downstairs. 590 00:23:53,098 --> 00:23:54,266 - You get it? - She was coming downstairs. 591 00:23:54,391 --> 00:23:56,226 - Yes, I get it. - Getting her shit off. 592 00:23:56,352 --> 00:24:00,022 Whatever the fuck you do, you keep her out of this damn car. 593 00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:01,231 You know what this car is? 594 00:24:01,357 --> 00:24:03,859 This car is the other fucking man. 595 00:24:03,984 --> 00:24:05,945 She is cheating on you with this fucking chair. 596 00:24:10,532 --> 00:24:11,909 - Ah. - Larry. 597 00:24:12,034 --> 00:24:13,786 - Hi. - Hi. 598 00:24:13,911 --> 00:24:15,371 I know I don't have an appointment now 599 00:24:15,496 --> 00:24:18,082 but I got a bill in the mail today. 600 00:24:18,207 --> 00:24:20,459 Am I to understand that you charged me 601 00:24:20,584 --> 00:24:23,420 for talking to me on line at the baseball card show? 602 00:24:23,545 --> 00:24:26,799 - Is that possible? - Well, yes, it is. 603 00:24:26,924 --> 00:24:30,636 Dr. Thurgood, we spoke for all of three minutes. 604 00:24:30,761 --> 00:24:32,137 Well, let me just point out to you, Larry 605 00:24:32,262 --> 00:24:34,598 that sometimes when people suffer with what I might call 606 00:24:34,723 --> 00:24:37,393 the more dramatic forms of narcissism 607 00:24:37,518 --> 00:24:39,936 they have a hard time gauging how long they've been talking 608 00:24:40,061 --> 00:24:42,606 about their problems or themselves. 609 00:24:42,731 --> 00:24:44,108 Are you saying I'm a narcissist? 610 00:24:44,233 --> 00:24:47,987 Larry, maybe I can help you understand this way. 611 00:24:48,112 --> 00:24:52,074 I had a client. He was quite an illustrious well-known director. 612 00:24:52,199 --> 00:24:53,282 I don't want to reveal who he was, 613 00:24:53,409 --> 00:24:54,868 but he did direct "Star Wars." 614 00:24:54,994 --> 00:24:56,494 And he enjoyed 615 00:24:56,619 --> 00:24:59,205 in his repertoire of things that he liked 616 00:24:59,330 --> 00:25:01,834 to see prostitutes. 617 00:25:01,959 --> 00:25:03,919 Now in that particular situation 618 00:25:04,044 --> 00:25:06,046 if he were to hire a prostitute, let's say for an hour 619 00:25:06,171 --> 00:25:07,381 which was normal for him-- 620 00:25:07,506 --> 00:25:08,799 You might as well call him George Lucas. 621 00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:10,592 I mean, that's who directed "Star Wars." 622 00:25:10,718 --> 00:25:12,177 Well, I would never say that. 623 00:25:12,302 --> 00:25:14,888 - I would never say that. - You just told me who it was. 624 00:25:15,013 --> 00:25:16,765 I merely alluded to the fact that he was 625 00:25:16,890 --> 00:25:18,308 a well-known director. 626 00:25:18,434 --> 00:25:20,352 Now one of the things that he needed 627 00:25:20,477 --> 00:25:21,729 to complete his work-- 628 00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:23,772 Everybody knows who directed "Star Wars." 629 00:25:23,897 --> 00:25:26,066 Well, not everyone is in show business, Larry. 630 00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:28,694 - Okay, go ahead. - My point is-- 631 00:25:28,819 --> 00:25:30,446 God knows what you're saying about me. 632 00:25:30,571 --> 00:25:31,739 No one asks about you. 633 00:25:31,864 --> 00:25:32,656 I didn't ask about George Lucas 634 00:25:32,781 --> 00:25:34,157 but you just brought him up. 635 00:25:34,282 --> 00:25:35,701 I merely said a well-known director. 636 00:25:35,826 --> 00:25:39,580 And here's my point. He used to frequent prostitutes. 637 00:25:39,705 --> 00:25:41,749 And very often he would hire them for an hour 638 00:25:41,874 --> 00:25:43,959 which was their minimum, but it only took him 639 00:25:44,084 --> 00:25:45,627 three or four or maybe five minutes 640 00:25:45,753 --> 00:25:48,213 to complete the shot, if you understand what I'm saying. 641 00:25:48,338 --> 00:25:52,092 However, they considered it fair and he considered it fair 642 00:25:52,217 --> 00:25:53,343 to pay them for the full hour. 643 00:25:53,469 --> 00:25:54,887 That was the way they did business. 644 00:25:55,012 --> 00:25:57,347 First off, I'm appalled by what you just said to me. 645 00:25:57,473 --> 00:25:59,391 He has a right to do what he wants. He's an adult. 646 00:25:59,516 --> 00:26:00,601 It's supposed to be confidential. 647 00:26:00,726 --> 00:26:01,977 You're not supposed to be telling people. 648 00:26:02,102 --> 00:26:03,686 It's merely by way of illustration. 649 00:26:03,811 --> 00:26:05,439 My point is that people need various things 650 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:07,148 to help them function. 651 00:26:07,273 --> 00:26:09,484 And my hope was that I was doing that for you. 652 00:26:09,609 --> 00:26:10,861 Well, it's good to see you. 653 00:26:10,986 --> 00:26:12,821 Yes, and congratulations, doctor. 654 00:26:12,946 --> 00:26:16,200 I think you've stumbled upon the perfect analogy 655 00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:17,868 for exactly what you do. 656 00:26:17,993 --> 00:26:20,329 Well, it's somewhere between a hobby and a profession 657 00:26:20,454 --> 00:26:21,872 for me just as it is for them. 658 00:26:21,997 --> 00:26:23,123 - Mm-hmm. - Good seeing you. 659 00:26:23,248 --> 00:26:24,333 Okay. 660 00:26:27,544 --> 00:26:29,171 Whew. You know what? 661 00:26:29,296 --> 00:26:31,507 Let me go in and give it a shot with the glasses on. 662 00:26:31,632 --> 00:26:33,425 I really don't think it's gonna work. 663 00:26:33,550 --> 00:26:35,719 - Let me go give it a shot. - Go ahead, give it a shot. 664 00:26:35,844 --> 00:26:38,305 Give me that bill, man. Fucking around. 665 00:26:40,182 --> 00:26:43,102 Dr. Thurgood, allow me to introduce myself. 666 00:26:49,483 --> 00:26:51,109 Mr. Black, really a pleasure to meet you. 667 00:26:51,234 --> 00:26:52,486 - A pleasure. - See you again I hope. 668 00:26:52,611 --> 00:26:55,071 - Take care. - You too. Bye, Larry. 669 00:26:56,782 --> 00:26:59,326 He tore the bill up, threw it in the garbage. Done. 670 00:26:59,451 --> 00:27:01,494 - What? You're kidding. - No, I'm not kidding. 671 00:27:01,619 --> 00:27:03,205 - Mm, the glasses, baby. - Amazing. 672 00:27:03,330 --> 00:27:04,705 - I told you. - It's a miracle. 673 00:27:04,832 --> 00:27:06,834 Yeah, on top of that shit, check it out. 674 00:27:06,959 --> 00:27:09,336 Mookie Wilson ball. How about that? 675 00:27:09,461 --> 00:27:11,964 Give that to Jeff now. Replace the ball you lost. 676 00:27:12,089 --> 00:27:13,965 See how it works? Ooh! 677 00:27:14,090 --> 00:27:15,968 - He gave you this? - No, I stole it. 678 00:27:22,141 --> 00:27:24,184 - Open up. Open up. - Alright. Hey, hey. 679 00:27:24,309 --> 00:27:26,478 - Take it easy. Here. - Listen, I need a ride. 680 00:27:26,603 --> 00:27:28,021 I need a ride. I don't want the fucking ball now. 681 00:27:28,147 --> 00:27:30,482 I need a ride. My cousin's building is on fire. 682 00:27:30,607 --> 00:27:32,776 Can you believe this? It's over by the Regency on park. 683 00:27:32,901 --> 00:27:33,944 I need a ride. It's an emergency 684 00:27:34,069 --> 00:27:35,195 You want a ride? 685 00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:37,656 Yeah, I need a ride over to my cousin's building. 686 00:27:37,781 --> 00:27:39,950 It's on fire. Larry, drive me! 687 00:27:40,075 --> 00:27:41,577 Just give me a fucking ride, okay? 688 00:27:41,702 --> 00:27:44,538 The building's on fire, Larry. Please, come on. Hurry up. 689 00:27:44,663 --> 00:27:46,039 - Open up. - What's the big deal? 690 00:27:46,165 --> 00:27:47,875 - It's a fire. - I need to get there. 691 00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:48,959 - It's my cousin. - Why? 692 00:27:49,084 --> 00:27:50,252 I need to get over there. 693 00:27:50,377 --> 00:27:52,462 What don't you understand about fire? 694 00:27:52,588 --> 00:27:55,590 - I'll pay for a cab. - I don't want to take a cab. 695 00:27:55,715 --> 00:27:57,634 Give me a fucking ride. What's the matter? 696 00:27:57,759 --> 00:28:00,304 Why can't you give me a goddamn ride? 697 00:28:00,429 --> 00:28:02,138 - You know what? I've got it. - Okay, what? 698 00:28:02,263 --> 00:28:04,099 Sit in the back seat. I'll give you a limo ride. 699 00:28:04,224 --> 00:28:05,517 Larry, I don't want a fucking limousine! 700 00:28:05,642 --> 00:28:06,643 Just open the fucking door. 701 00:28:06,768 --> 00:28:08,729 - Alright, you drive. - I don't want to drive! 702 00:28:08,854 --> 00:28:10,189 I'm hysterical. Don't you see that? 703 00:28:10,314 --> 00:28:11,607 I can't drive. I can't focus. 704 00:28:11,732 --> 00:28:13,025 - She might be-- - Alright, alright! 705 00:28:13,150 --> 00:28:15,652 - Get in the car. - Make such a big fucking deal. 706 00:28:15,777 --> 00:28:18,780 I ask for a little ride across town. 707 00:28:20,532 --> 00:28:24,328 What? What are you waiting for? 708 00:28:24,453 --> 00:28:26,288 Why are you driving like a snail? 709 00:28:32,252 --> 00:28:36,048 No. 710 00:28:36,173 --> 00:28:39,301 No. No. 711 00:28:55,067 --> 00:28:56,360 No. 712 00:29:04,159 --> 00:29:05,744 What the fuck, Larry? 713 00:29:05,869 --> 00:29:08,497 Jesus fucking Christ. Asshole. 714 00:29:08,622 --> 00:29:10,374 - What the hell did you do? - Oh my God. 715 00:29:10,499 --> 00:29:13,126 - It was your fault. - It was not my fault. 716 00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:14,628 - Are you all right? - Oh my God! 717 00:29:14,753 --> 00:29:16,755 - Yeah. - Oh my God! 718 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:18,465 - Is she alright? - Who cares? 719 00:29:18,590 --> 00:29:22,261 - I'm so sorry. - Hillary! 720 00:29:22,386 --> 00:29:24,513 Jesus, what the hell is going on over here? 721 00:29:24,638 --> 00:29:26,181 Looks like quite a fire. 722 00:29:29,268 --> 00:29:31,478 - Hey, Buck. - Hey, Larry. 723 00:29:31,603 --> 00:29:32,980 - What are you doing? - What are you doing here? 724 00:29:33,105 --> 00:29:34,690 My hotel is just right down the street 725 00:29:34,815 --> 00:29:36,275 and I was going for a little walk. 726 00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:37,734 My baby! 727 00:29:37,859 --> 00:29:39,903 Please, somebody help me. 728 00:29:40,028 --> 00:29:42,864 Please help me! My baby! 729 00:29:42,990 --> 00:29:44,783 Please, somebody help me! 730 00:29:44,908 --> 00:29:46,576 - Drop it. - It's safe for a baby. 731 00:29:46,702 --> 00:29:47,911 Go ahead, we're ready. 732 00:29:48,036 --> 00:29:49,538 - No, I can't. - We're ready, let's go. 733 00:29:49,663 --> 00:29:51,456 We're ready now. 734 00:29:51,581 --> 00:29:52,749 Come on, come on! You can do it. 735 00:29:52,874 --> 00:29:55,335 - Drop it! - Let it go! 736 00:29:55,460 --> 00:29:59,548 - Throw the baby! - I can't! No! 737 00:30:57,564 --> 00:30:59,107 Oh my God! 738 00:30:59,232 --> 00:31:01,443 Oh my God! I can't believe it! 739 00:31:01,568 --> 00:31:04,488 Unbelievable. I've never seen anything like that in my life. 740 00:31:04,613 --> 00:31:07,157 - Nice catch, Bill. - Thanks. 741 00:31:12,871 --> 00:31:15,874 Yeah! Hey, alright! 742 00:31:23,340 --> 00:31:25,717 Well, so... 743 00:31:25,842 --> 00:31:27,886 - How was that? - It was good. 744 00:31:29,054 --> 00:31:31,056 You know what I'd like to do now? 745 00:31:32,724 --> 00:31:36,853 Go for a really long drive.